New Year-Same Old, Same Old

I hate New Year's Eve and New Year's Day. New Year's Day, in my opinion, barely qualifies as a holiday and I detest it. Kind of random for an opening line, huh? Especially considering its actually January 26, well past that particular "holiday". You know I said that for a reason, right? Other than to state my opinion about New Year's as a preposterous non-holiday holiday. I said it to let you know what this blog post is about. Just wanted to make that clear. You've known me long enough to know that subtlety is not my strong-suit. Sarcasm and stating the obvious are my strong-suits. Thus this paragraph. It's rife with my strong-suits.

Anyway, allow me to enlighten you as to why I hate New Year's Day. In our house, currently Horseford Road and previously Poplar Street before that, the inevitability of 12/31 and 01/01 makes family members quake with fear. Not because we're afraid of noise makers and stupid looking hats and confetti. No, if only that was our only concern. No, that time period evokes fear in the hearts of myself, the hubs and, to a lesser degree, the punks, because we never know what kind of medical tragedy is going to befall us or our other family members.

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that I'm crazy. And of course, you're right. I am but that's got nothing to do with this and is a completely separate blog. I talk alot about studies and empirical evidence, even though I've never actually done any studies or provided any empirical evidence to back any of my non-existent studies. I actually have proof of this though. I can provide irrefutable proof that somewhere, someone or something, is determined to make us so afraid of 12/31 and 01/01 that we'll lock ourselves in our home on Christmas Day and not resurface again until Martin Luther King Jr's birthday.

Example #1: (This evidence will be presented in descending order, with the most recent examples provided first, because it's easier for me to remember that way. And it's my blog and I can do whatever I want.)

Anyway, Example #1(2011/2012) : Toothache, pulled muscle, "broken" foot.
As seen previously on Facebook, because pretty much everything on this blog has been seen previously on Facebook, 01/02/2012 found me lying on the couch after having a tooth yanked unceremoniously from my jaw. The toothache developed on 12/30/2011 but really kicked in on 01/01/2012. I seriously thought I was going to die. Well, not really. I didn't think I was going to die but man alive it reallllllllly hurt.

On 12/31, I was baking cupcakes or something, moved funny, and pulled a muscle in my back. It hurt then, especially when I had to sit through our New Year's service at church and found it difficult to get comfortable. On 01/01 it hurt worse but I was so consumed by other pain, from my tooth, and hopped up on Motrin, that I didn't notice it too much.

Prior to this, on 12/29, I think, I stood up from my couch. My foot was asleep and I came down funny on it and seriously thought I'd broken it. It hurt like CRAZY!! I had this awesome big knot or something pop up on it, it swelled, and turned some lovely shades of blue and yellow. It actually still hurts.

That was the most recent incident. Now, let's skip back to 01/04/2011. I know that this is not actually New Year's Eve or New Year's day but close enough.

Example #2 (2010/2011): As previously reported on Facebook and in this blog, I fell down the basement stairs and thought I was going to die. Well, not really. But it hurt alot. And it was embarrassing. I'll spare you the repetition of the details here and refer you to the post titled, "The Day I Ripped My New Tights", or something like that.

Now, let's skip back a little farther, before this blog was conceived. I know it's hard to think of a time that I wasn't spewing out the Gospel According to BKCMom, but trust me, there was a time. A time before it was put into writing anyway. This incident does not involve me, but should serve as a warning to family members that being related to me is not necessarily in your best interest, if there was previously a question regarding that.

I don't know the exact date of this of the next example. I know I was just returning to work at my oldest old job from the holiday break, which would have happened on 01/04/2010 or thereabouts. And it was before I started my new old job, which was 01/10/2010. So, again, not necessarily specific to the holiday but close enough to be jumbled in with the others. Someone else in the family can clarify the dates.

Example #3 (2009/2010): A weekend evening. Cleaning up after Christmas decorations were taken down. Hubs gets a call stating that his father has had some sort of cardiac episode and is being taken to the hospital. Episode results in father-in-law having major cardiac by-pass surgery. Again, not really about me but illustrates the point that most of the time, we're spending some time during the first week of January at the hospital.

The worst of the worst. We seemed to have a couple of relatively quiet ones, as far as I can remember but the two previous ones more than made up for it.

Example #4 (2006/2007): On 12/29/2006 we were told that our baby's cancer had returned and there was nothing left to be done for him. On 12/31 he spiked a fever and had to go to the emergency room. While there he started having a seizure and had to be flown via helicopter to Columbus. We followed behind. Somewhere near Ironton, OH, I was pulled over by an Ohio Highway Patrolman. Hubs was asleep beside me. I woke him up. I had to open my door because, at the time, the driver's window of my car wouldn't roll down. I couldn't find some of the documentation that he'd asked for. I was wearing a big sloppy t-shirt because my angel had puked on my sweater in the emergency room. I told the Patrolman that he'd been flown out and we were heading for the hospital. He let me go and told me to slow down. I didn't.

Example #5 (2005/2006) As previously described in another post on this blog, 12/31/2005 was the day our baby was diagnosed with cancer. New Year's Eve and Day were spent in the hospital. He was sick, I was experiencing morning sickness, and everyone was worried, grieving, and stressed.

This one again doesn't involve me but should also serve as a warning to family members, especially the in-laws, that the last week of December and first week of January would be a good time to stay away from me. I think this is the right year. I'm not sure on the the dates but I know it was New Years because we'd just ordered furniture and I was excited about that. Angel BK was a baby at the time but I wasn't working so he was less than 2 years old. He was walking already when this occurred because I can remember him walking around in our empty living room when we awaited the delivery of our furniture. He started walking about about 14 months. So that narrows the timeline down pretty good.

Example #6 (2004/2005) At this time the father-in-law drove a truck on the road. By that I mean he drove a semi and delivered stuff. He was in Tennessee at the time and got incredibly sick when he made his delivery. He actually had to be hospitalized. His wife went to be with him. She got sick as well. So, the hubs, the baby, me and the brother-in-law loaded up and drove several hours to retrieve both people and both of their vehicles. Of course this is nowhere near as traumatic as the other examples but it was the first. We spent the entire, I mean entire, day on the road. It was awful. A baby buckled in a car seat for an entire day. If that happened now, I'd probably tell everyone involved they were on their own. I was much nicer then.

Now, as far as I can remember, those are the only examples I have. I need to remind you though that out of the 11 new years my husband and I have welcomed together, 6 of them have been spent thus. So, the moral of this story? New Year's=Bad.

Wow.....

Okay, so it's been a really long time since I did a blog post. I have no excuse other than to say I've been busy...............Okay, okay, okay. I didn't believe I was going to leave it at that either. If you know anything about me there's no making a long story short where I'm concerned. There's certainly the exact opposite of that, making a short story long, but NEVER making a long story short. So, of course I have an excuse. I've been busy. To make a short story long, I've been a single parent for most of this time. I haven't left my baby daddy or anything, he's just been working away from home for the majority of the time since I last wrote a blog post. And of course, I've been diligent in my housewifery. Somewhere in this house, my hubs just laughed out loud and he has no idea why. I've been watching a lot of Spongebob and Phineas and Ferb. I prefer P & F but I have little say in the matter. And, naturally, I've been baking cupcakes, sometimes a couple hundred sometimes just a few. But I've definitely been baking them.

See.....

Hey, wait a minute. That's not me. That's my cutie-patootie, freckled-face niece Banana and her baby sister, Ta. And that's not cupcakes, that's sugar cookies. That's when they stayed all night at our house. It was like one of those food vacations you can take, where you check out all the local restaurants and stuff. These awesome chicks came to my house, ate pizza for dinner, made sugar cookies, had chips and cheese and popcorn while we watched a movie, had waffles for breakfast the next morning, and then made, you know, cupcakes. I promised Banana I'd feature her in my blog. I'd forgotten to do it when she helped me put the chocolate fountain together for her brother's graduation party, so I definitely owed her. So, Banana, here you go!!

In other news, this is my kid....

If you're on my Facebook, you've already seen this. I don't mean this is my kid in disguise, I mean this is my kid. He just took this costume out the other day and wore it around for the entire day. If he's not wearing this, he's definitely wearing his cape. He wears it all the time. And if he's not wearing this costume, he's definitely wearing his pajamas, if he's home. Because, if he's home, he's always wearing his pajamas. He doesn't want to wear anything but his pajamas. Sometimes, he takes his pajamas off, takes a bath, then puts his pajamas back on. His Spongebob pajamas are his favs. But, in the event that he's worn them for a few days straight and Mommy or Daddy makes him take them off so they can be laundered, he'll wear something else. So long as it's pajamas. And he will take his pajamas off to put other pajamas on, if he stumbles across a pair that he likes better. Here, he's mixing it up a bit, Spongebob and Iron Man (they're really Superman but he things every thing is Iron Man). Pay no attention to the glasses, they're prescription. :)

This is my other turkey. He really was Iron Man. This of course was from Halloween. We went Trick-or-Treating. I think we went to 8 houses. We still haven't eaten all of the candy.

This is also my boy, the day after Thanksgiving, putting wreaths onto the windows upstairs. Now, this picture is old, and most everyone has seen it already. So, we've been lectured and told not to let our 5 year old on the roof. And we've replied, "Sheesh, it was just the porch roof. He was only one story up. And he's been wanting to do it for years now. Lighten up." Let me tell you, that is not a response people appreciate. They don't appreciate it all. It makes me laugh though and really, isn't that all that matters. (My child was never in any danger during the taking of this picture or the hanging of the wreaths. Come on people, give us some credit.)

In other news, we are now the proud owners of a new vehicle. Yeah, this is my new ride.

I'm kidding of course. This is not my new ride. This is in fact a concrete truck. How many of you were thinking that this is exactly the kind of truck I need to drive? You can admit it. I expect most of you, especially the ones related to me by blood, to think that. I'm horribly offended but, what can you do? This is when we poured concrete for a patio at the rear of our house. My big boy was at school so I had to document the entire thing. Yeah, it was somewhat uncomfortable. I was running around in our yard with a camera and a camcorder while 4 men were doing all the things that concrete requires. I'm fairly certain they either thought I was a lunatic or interested in taking one or more of them out to dinner.

So, now it's Christmas time. I'm still baking cupcakes. Now I'm making fudge, cookies, and truffles as well. And I've discovered that I despise making truffles. So, don't expect any from me. Ever. Seriously, I hate them. With every fiber of my being. What I don't hate......

Look!!! It's my favorite things!!! Gorgeous shoes and sugary sweet goodness!!! Ah.....

More sugary sweet goodness. I watched this movie. My reaction at the time was, "Oh, Thor, where have you been all my life?" My reaction remains the same.

And, of course I still love purses. So, Santa, if you're listening, I would really like a new purse. I've behaved no more inappropriately than I have any other year, so......It's true, I haven't purchased any of the above pictures in a very long time. Wait! No. I mean, I haven't purchases shoes or purses in a very long time. I've NEVER purchased a human being. Ever.

That's not to say, of course, that, were the occassion to present itself, I would not purchase Thor. Because, I can't promise that. But, that's another post for another day. And a long discussion between the hubs and myself to determine if we have the money, if it would require an addition to the house, you know, things like that.

I'm kidding of course. Right now, the only men I wish to have in my life are these dudes and the one taking the picture....

I know I look like a deranged axe murderer in this picture but like I said before, what can you do?

Oh my goodness!! It's been almost 2 months since I wrote on this blog. You, my beautiful viewing public have gone almost 2 months since you've been subjected to, tortured by, gifted with a blog post. I'm sure you've been terribly disappointed. So, it is my compulsion, obsession, pleasure to provide you with one.

So, you're asking yourself, what has BKCMom been so busy doing that she has forsaken her audience? In a word, a word that you're no doubt TIRED of hearing, cupcakes. Yes, I said it even though I think I promised in another post that I wouldn't. I've been busy making cupcakes, hundreds of dozens of cupcakes. And for a change of pace, that isn't an exaggeration. I've literally made hundreds of dozens of cupcakes. And sold them. For money. But don't tell the health department that I've been doing that, because they really don't like it when people make food in their homes and sell it. I was informed of that recently via certified letter. I'm pretty sure no good news comes via certified mail.

In other news, my Big BK has started school, kindergarten to be exact. He was so excited the first morning that he wanted to go early. He was wearing one of his 11 new outfits. He looked like this....

 Because this picture is the first day of school.

I was so proud of him. He didn't cry when I left, which was about 10 minutes after we got there. He just hugged me and told me he loved me. I've raised such an independent, brave little boy. Well, I guess his daddy, mommaw and poppaw had something to do with it too. But I don't mind taking credit.

When I picked him up at the end of the day he asked me if he had to go back the next day. I told him yes. I'm not sure how happy he was about it.

Day number 2 he had homework to do. By the time we finished with his homework, he was exhausted, I was exhausted, we'd both shed alot of tears and done a lot of yelling. This is what his homework looked like.

Yes, your eyes are not deceiving you. He had to write his name, 3 letters, followed by an uppercase L, a zero, a lowercase L and a circle. He had to do these things 3 time. And it took.....two......hours. I'm tired just thinking about it now. Things have gotten better since then. Now it takes nowhere near that long. And let me tell you, I'm happy about that.

I can't go into what the baby has been doing for the past few weeks. It's completely inappropriate for this blog, as it's completely family-friendly. Suffice it to say, he's entered a phase in his toddlerdom that I really wish he wasn't in. I REALLLLLY wish he wasn't in this phase.

In case you were curious about what I've been doing, what I mentioned earlier, here is some photographic evidence of my endeavours...

The cupcakes pictured here are: Red Velvet, Coconut, and Banana Pudding. If you ever have the opportunity to try the Banana Pudding, I strongly recommend that you try it. It will change your life. It is that good. The others aren't bad either, if I do say so, and you know I do.....:)

Brotherly Advice

You know what I love? (I ask this question not "Do you care what I love?" because I KNOW you care about what I love. Otherwise, you're not reading this scintilatting bit of fluff.) I absolutely love hearing my big boy, you know, this dude, the one hauling our dog across the front yard to throw her in his tiny pool.  

I love hearing him, when he's not hauling around the livestock, lecture his little brother about sharing. He said, and I quote, "You have to share. Jesus doesn't like it when you don't share. It's not nice."

Sound advice, I'd say. Actually, I think it's bordering on wonderful since it's exactly what his father and I have told him countless times. And yes, I love this because I'm proud that he's listening. I didn't mean it that way though. I was being somewhat sarcastic. I know that you find it hard to believe that I would be anything other than completely forthright and plainspoken in my interactions with my children and my writing. It's a character trait that I've tried to hide but now you know, I can be a little sarcastic sometimes. And a little facetious. And perhaps a little acerbic. I apologize if this comes as a shock to you.

The reason I enjoyed this much-needed and often-repeated lecture on sharing was because the punk actually giving the lecture is the same one who has wholloped his brother over the head to take something from him and the one who has screamed with so much dramatic flair that Joan Crawford and Bette Davis would have pronounced him over doing it a bit, and again, this is a quote, "I won't share! I'm never going to share ever again!"

Just found this post. Don't know where I was going with it so don't know how to finish it. Hope you enjoyed it though.